Writer urges families to spend more time with ageing parents
A commentary by Chukwuneta Oby argues that adult children should not assume their parents will always be available. Drawing on accounts of elderly widows and her own mother’s death, the writer says infrequent visits can leave older people isolated and families with lasting regret.
Writer Chukwuneta Oby has urged adult children to spend more time with ageing parents, warning that opportunities for visits may be fewer than they imagine. The commentary describes a widowed man in his late sixties whose three married children live in the same country but visit only once a year. Oby also recounts hearing from a widow whose loneliness is eased by children she helped raise because her own children live abroad.
She argues that distance and busy lives should not automatically prevent regular contact where visits are possible. One family friend, she writes, speaks frequently with her daughter but has not seen her for several years. Oby connects the issue to her own experience.
Her mother died in March 2022, and Oby recalls that, shortly before leaving her, she promised to return soon without knowing that the next meeting would be their last. The writer says older people can experience severe loneliness even when they are financially comfortable. She encourages families to show presence now rather than postponing care and affection, arguing that a later burial cannot replace the life and companionship that might have been offered earlier.
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